


How to Join a Family

by Drowsy_Salamander



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Episode 21: Freefall, Episode Related, Fairchild parties are absolutely wild, Gen, Harriet wanted to make a friend, No beta we kayak like Tim, Simon cannot relate to other humans, Weird family dynamics, and non humans, but the Vast was the real friends we made along the way, but then nihilism slipped in, damn thing is more persistent that Jane's worms, discussions on the nature of meaning in an uncaring universe, this was meant to be funny, you cannot convince me otherwise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:13:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25229653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drowsy_Salamander/pseuds/Drowsy_Salamander
Summary: A conversation Simon Fairchild has with Harriet Fairchild after Robert Kelly fell for days (and didn't enjoy it) about meaning, the universe and family.
Relationships: Simon Fairchild & Harriet Fairchild
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	How to Join a Family

**Author's Note:**

> You ever relisten to a statement and be like 'huh'
> 
> So for those who need a refresher, Freefall is the episode where Robert Kelly fell for several days during an old man's jump in honour of his wife. He is later eaten by the sky. Harriet Fairchild was the other person doing the jump and with a surname like that, it's safe to say she's an avatar.  
> It is my theory that this event was Robert's audition for the Fairchild family which he obviously failed and that's an idea I wanted to look at. But then this ended up being a bit of a character study. Oops?

Harriet watched Robert Kelly stalk away, his fear stark in the air around him. The Fall had terrified him. He’d failed the test he hadn’t even realised he’d been taking. He was too scared to even consider sky diving again let alone giving himself to great expanse. She’d been wrong about him. Her mouth twitched in irritation; she’d need to tell Simon the verdict. Simon had decided to not wait for him to come down, saying that if he did choose the Vast then Harriet would be able to explain the mundane details and Simon need only sweep in for ‘the fun parts’.

Harriet walked slowly towards Simon, there was no need to rush. While he was always rather excited, he also did not care how long something took. In the grand scheme of things did it matter if Harriet ran to tell him news or took hours to so, at the end of the day it didn’t matter.

“What’s the verdict then?” Simon chirped. “Do I need to start drawing up adoption papers?”

“No,” Harriet shook her head, “he quit.”

“My, my,” Simon said, eyes widening in what was potentially real surprise, “seems you misjudged Mr. Kelly.”

“I suppose.” Harriet sighed. “Maybe we were too soon?”

“Or maybe he wasn’t a good fit for our patron.” Simon said. “There’s really no way to tell until they,” Simon waved his hand, wiggling his fingers, “fall. Or sink or what have you. But falling really is the most fun option.”

“I just…” Harriet paused. “I really thought he would get it. He had such a love for the sky.”

“Ah, but was it a love for the vastness of the sky and it’s infinity or a simple adrenaline rush?” Simon said.

“It’s not as though all of us start off with a pure love of all things vast.” Harriet pointed out needled. “I didn’t.”

“But you gave yourself into it.” Simon pointed out. “Gave yourself to it in mind and body and anything else that matters.”

Harriet closed her eyes and tried to remember how exactly it had felt. She’d always been the outdoorsy type, wanting to conquer nature. Ha! As though anything as insignificant as a human could conquer nature. Harriet had been trying to rock climb in Siurana with Rob Fairchild when the ground and all other rocks and cliffs had vanished and no matter how high she climbed in any direction, the rock she was on never ended. Its sheer size was too much for her, she would never be able to overcome it, it would never end. After what felt like days, she’d cut her harness and jumped off the cliff into the greedy space and flew.

She’d been happy to jump, hadn’t she? There had been desperation and despair but there was also joy in the fall. Not that it would really matter at this point.

“I just wanted to show it to someone else.” Harriet said quietly.

“And you’re disappointed that he didn’t understand?” Simon asked, not without sympathy.

“I suppose so.” Harriet said. “It is disappointing.”

“And it’s a disappointment you must become used to.” Simon bounced on the balls of his feet. “Why, no one I’ve shown it to has fully understood.”

Harriet looked up sharply. “What about all of us?”

“All the Fairchilds?” Simon said lightly, “You have a _better_ grasp of the beauty of the Falling Titan and yet… you’re all still so finite.”

“It’s not like you’re not finite too.” Harriet snapped.

“True! Very true.” Simon laughed. “Such is our lot, to be aware of the grandness of the universe and to be utterly unable to communicate it, trapped to a temporary existence unable to truly _explain_. We are the ants who looked up to see the moon and understood it, how can we tell the rest of the hive, or even the other ants who see it?”

“Sounds like you’ve been spending to much time with Peter Lukas again.” Harriet muttered.

“Well, I hardly said that not being able to form human connections was a bad thing, I personally find it to be pointless.” Simon said. “And as you know—”

“Yes, I know the Eternal Sky and the damn fog people aren’t that separate.” Harriet scowled, tired. “I know that trying to delineate fears is pointless because they all feed into each other, I know.”

“Starting to sound like you should be working in the Magnus Institute.” Simon chortled.

“Speaking of that,” Harriet smiled in spite of herself, “Your late wife, Ellie Bouchard?”

“He’s certainly hysterical to be someone’s wife.” Simon said. “Anyway, Robert will probably end up giving a statement to the Institute, so really it was a bit in honour of my ‘wife’.”

Harriet did laugh at that. “You’re utterly ridiculous.” She shook her head.

“What else am I to do while waiting for humanity to finally remember what it should be scared of?” Simon bounced.

Harriet inclined her head in agreement then paused. The two stood in silence for a minute before Harriet said, “I don’t think I’m nihilistic for all this.”

“Nihilism is such a fancy word for it,” Simon wrinkled his nose, “but it’s hardly mandatory to serving our patron.”

“Maybe but it is the world view the Vast pushes us towards. Indirectly” She added quickly before Simon could point out the Vast would never bother trying to influence one person’s mind. “And it’s… I don’t know. It’s not that I miss people or that I regret anything I’m doing but…”

“I don’t think you’re quite ready to give up the idea you matter, hmm?” Simon asked.

“Even if we can never impact the universe, even though we are a pointless speck of dust in the cosmos, can we not still make our own impacts?” Harriet hazarded. “We can never change anything that truly matters but we can still do things that matter to us, still find joy in serving the Vast? And if we can do that, then should we not try to connect with those who share our outlooks. Can we not try to coerce others to serve our goals as well?”

“My dear,” Simon said, “I have never tried to tell you what to believe. If you want to imagine meaning to your existence, I am hardly going to interfere, it truly does not matter if you serve the Vast while feeling as though you are nothing or if you serve the Vast to find meaning. And as you can tell from the little gathering I’ve collected, I am hardly against likeminded people coming together. Also, it’s more fun to have a family! Parties are so much better with more people.”

Harriet grinned faintly as she remembered the last Fairchild family reunion. She didn’t remember too much of it but what she could remember had been amazing. Maya Fairchild had tried to make the moon seem bigger and then ended up floating upside by accident and someone had started playing a game of ‘don’t let the balloon touch the ground’ with Maya as the balloon. “I can hardly say being a part of this family doesn’t come with benefits.”

“The money?” Simon asked.

“That may be one, yes.” Harriet said. The Fairchilds were a weird bunch, some even more ‘big picture’ than Simon and others being down right antisocial but on the whole, there was something comforting about a group that, if not understand who you are, at least understand what you are. There was a great distance between them all even if they could laugh together, emotional intimacy didn’t really happen but Harriet didn’t think she really wanted it to happen.

Was Harriet lonely? At the very least she knew she wasn’t Lonely but was that enough? Did it even matter if she lonely? If she had no people to properly know her, did that matter? Did people even compare to the sheer majesty of gravity?

Robert Kelly had been… fun. She didn’t even especially like the man but she’d thought he would be able to transition into understanding more, his love for sky diving had seemed so promising. So yes, it was a pity that, ultimately, he just another human but did that really matter. “I think… I think if Robert Kelly won’t serve the Vast as a servant, he may as well serve it in a different way.”

“I’ll leave this one up to you.” Simon patted her on the shoulder.

“I have to go do some of the mundane clean up now.” Harriet said. “Wish I could just toss paperwork into the Vast.”

Simon laughed. “I don’t want to keep you then!” and stepped into the air. Harriet watched him fall upwards, gaining speed until he was out of sight. She picked up the discarded parachute they’d decided not to use and sighed. She tossed the thing up into the Vast, let it drop the thing wherever it wanted.

Maybe she’d push Robert Kelly into the sky or have it grab him. No need to make a decision now, she had all the time in the infinite universe.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading this!  
> It was written all in one go at like half eleven, so if it's a bit of a mess, sorry.


End file.
